February.3rd.1999
Past issues are available. o (11.1.98) o (11.11.98) o (11.16.98) o (11.17.98) o (1.12.99) o (2.2.99)
The matters discussed here are of national interest. Past topics have included nuclear disarmament, hormone-mimicing environmental hazards, sustainable agriculture and the risk of high levels of scat production to our strained toxic transport systems. - - - - - - - - - -
Does an apple a day really keep the doctor away? Is it like vampires with garlic? What about a banana? Does that also keep the doctor away? What if I wanted to keep the dentist away? Would this same rule apply?
Yes. No. Yes, and yes. Apple. Yes.
Here's a more in-depth answer (the source can be found at http://www.deproverbio.com/DPjournal/DP,1,1,95/MEDICAL.html):
The most often quoted medical proverb is without doubt the simple dietary advice "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". Its origin and history are still quite uncertain, but it probably gained currency in the English language towards the end of the 19th century (Seidl 1982:73-75, Mieder 1984:8). An English precursor might have been the proverb "Eat an apple on going to bed, And you'll keep the doctor from earning his bread" that was registered in the journal Notes and Queries in 1866. But strange as it might seem, the extremely popular proverb "An apple a day keeps the doctor away" has been found in print thus far for the first time only in 1913: "Ait a happle avore gwain to bed, An' you'll make the doctor beg his bread; or as the more popular version runs: An apple a day keeps the doctor away" (Stevenson 1948:86, Wilson 1970:17, Simpson 1982:5). That the proverb caught on quickly can be seen by the fact that parodies of it start to appear in print as early as the 1930s, as for example "An onion a day keeps the world away" (Bradley 1937:60, Whiting 1952:362). A proverb that is quoted as often as this one, to the point perhaps that we can't look at or eat apples without thinking of it, will be subjected to parody.
The truth of its wisdom, not so much that eating a daily apple will definitely prevent a serious illness but rather that it makes good nutritional sense to eat a piece of fruit every day, is so obvious that it literally beckons to be ridiculed through clever changes of its simple wording. In fact, the entire proverb has by now been reduced to the structural formula "An X a day keeps Y away", making a steady stream of puns and parodies possible.
What follows is a small florilegium of such humorous but often also satirical variations of the proverb that have been found in literary works, in advertisements, cartoons, comic strips and on greeting cards. While many of them are quite funny, they still express problems and concerns of our society which unfortunately cannot heal all of its ills by simply telling people to eat an apple a day. Thus a 1940 poem by Phyllis McGinley (b. 1905) is entitled "A Hobby a Day Keeps the Doldrums Away" (McGinley 1959:111-112), and a couple of detective novels include the variations "A murder a day keeps the doctor away" and "A murder a day keeps boredom away" (Whiting 1989:14). Louis Safian confronted the proverb with the antipodes "An onion a day gives your diet away" and "An onion a day keeps everybody away" (Safian 1967:30), of which the latter has also been registered as graffiti (Mieder 1989:265). A sexual pun characterizes yet another graffiti text that reads "A pill a day keeps the stork away" (Mieder 1989:272) that also alludes to the folklore of the stork bringing the children. Sexual or marital politics are commented upon in an Andy Capp comic strip that includes the statement that "A crisis a day keeps his lordship away" (St. Louis Post Dispatch, Jan. 30, 1976:10D), and perhaps married couples should adhere to the modern wisdom "An effort a day keeps failure away" that found its way onto a small wooden plaque sold in 1978 in a gift shop in Salt Lake City, Utah. Richard Nixon, it will be recalled, made various efforts to avoid losing his presidency which finally led to the keen observation by the national columnist James Reston (b. 1909) that seemingly "A crisis a day keeps impeachment away" (Burlington Free Press, Oct. 30, 1973:2A). Finally we can also refer to a cartoon that comments in a humorous way on today's emphasis on gettting proper exercise, for "A bike a day keeps the weight away" (San Francisco Chronicle, Feb. 2, 1980:comic section). Even Blue Cross, Blue Shield got in on the exercising campaign, arguing that running "5 Miles a Day Keeps the Doctor Away" (Time, Nov. 13:1978:31). Too bad that the easy eating of an apple a day does not appear to suffice anymore today to keep the doctor away.
The Kraft's food conglomorate used variations of the proverb "An apple a day keeps the doctor" away" for two rather large national advertising campaigns that each ran for a number of years in various magazines. In the one case the firm advertised marshmallows by depicting a cute child holding a bag of this product and including the following slogans: "A marshmallow a day makes your blue eyes bluer" (Good Housekeeping, June 1974:55), "A marshmallow a day puts a twinkle in your eye" (Better Homes and Gardens, April 1976:113), "A marshmallow a day puts a smile on your face" (Family Circle, July 14, 1976:15), and "A marshmallow a day keeps your freckles on straight" (Family Circle, Dec. 13, 1977:15). A similar advertising campaign was used by Kraft to market its many different types of salad dressing. This time each advertisement included a picture of the various products and always the same slogan "A flavor a day keeps temptation away" (Better Homes and Gardens, March 1975:93; Good Housekeeping, July 1976:22; Good Housekeeping, July 1977:17; and Family Circle, July 10, 1978:55). The latter slogan returns to the initial intent of the medical proverb, i.e. the altered proverbial slogan is also arguing for dietary awareness, albeit this time for a varied diet of salad dressings for our salads that might prevent us from eating unhealthy and heavy meals. Realizing the infatuation of our society with meals made up of salads alone, it must be assumed that these magazine advertisements were a mercantile success for the Kraft Company.
A number of allusions to our proverb can be characterized by having replaced only the noun "apple" and leaving the remainder of the proverb intact, thus following the structural formula "An X a day keeps the doctor away". A funny greeting card, for example, contains the message "If a smile a day will keep the doctor away ... Here's Mine!" (Drawer Card, 1978). Another sexually oriented card has a humorous figure dressed in a condom happily singing out "A condom a day keeps the doctor away", while the inside message wishes the recipient of the card "A Happy Birthday and a safe New Year" (Recycled Paper Products, 1987). This makes us wonder whether one of the condom producers has not already come up with the slogan "A condom a day keeps AIDS away"? It's amazing how adaptable proverbial structures are when it comes to create new slogans for the modern age (Mieder and Mieder 1977, rpt. in Mieder and Dundes 1981:309-322). Such a condom slogan would, by the way, be strengthened by the fact that its wording and structure would also recall the old medical proverb "An apple a day keeps the doctor away", therefore reminding the consumer that condoms might be as important to their health as apples. Of course, the Gates Rubber Co. had no real apples or doctors in mind either when it advertised its various types of belts for cars and appliances with the headline "Keeps him away" (Fortune, June 1965:79). The truncated proverbial slogan and the illustration of two such belts in the shape of an apple simply want to convey the effective message that these superb rubber products will "keep the repairman away". The underlying metaphor of the health proverb does it part in convincing the consumer to trust and also purchase this reliable industrial product.
Quite naturally many of the modern adaptations of the proverb deal with food and dietary matters. There is even the cartoon whose caption declares that "A beer a day keeps the doctor away" (Punch, Feb. 13, 1985:62), a health rule that I have heard many a German friend expound upon. A magazine article on food diets has also claimed that "A slice of pizza a day keeps the doctor away" (People, July 27, 1981:80), whereby the emphasis is obviously on "a slice" and not the entire pizza.
In this connection we can also refer to a wonderful Peanuts greeting card wishing someone well. Snoopy tells the sick Lionel "Get well soon and remember: 'A pizza a day keeps the doctor away'." Lionel corrects Snoopy with the answer "That's 'An apple a day keeps the doctor away". Snoopy then declares that "Actually, if the pizza has lots of garlic on it, it keeps everyone away!" To that Lionel can only respond with "Good grief!" - with the final message of the card reading "Anyway, get well soon!" (Hallmark Card, 1977). The intent of this card is to get the patient's appetite and spirit up again, something that the thought of pizza and good time might be able to accomplish better than the idea of an apple.
What a pizza can do, a potato ought to be able to accomplish as well or even better. Already in 1974 the Boston Globe newspaper ran the following advertisement in a national magazine: "Can a potato a day keep the doctor away? If an apple can, a potato can, too. In fact, it can probably do it better. It has more vitamin C. More protein. And more calories. O.K., knowing this may not change your life. But it might help you plan your meals next week. Which is why we have a daily column called 'Nutrition'. It's written by Dr. Jean Mayer of Harvard. It covers all the latest findings of developments on food" (Woman's Day, Nov, 1974:253). This altered proverb slogan in the form of a question is a most effective way to draw attention to this particular newspaper column by a Harvard medical doctor no less. It will doubtlessly have drawn people's attention to these reports on modern insights into healthy foods. And sure enough, about ten years later we find yet another magazine article telling us about the miraculous potato, for believe it or not, "A potato a day could keep high blood pressure away" (Vermont, Fall 1986:12). If only a raw potato in our lunch bags would taste as good as a delicious apple! O well, we could of course also settle for a hot cup of soup for lunch to keep us fit and trim, for the advertising claim has been made that "Campbell's Soup. [is] Better than an Apple a Day" (Time, March 7, 1983:35).
Indeed, we are obsessed with health issues and staying away from the doctor. Unfortunately life isn't always fair and even a steady diet of apples will not avoid illness and death. This reality is drastically illustrated in a cartoon where a bug pauses in front of an apple tree with the sign "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". As the bug decides to crawl up the tree to eat its share of this health food, an apple falls and smashes it to death: "Splat" (Boston Globe, April 22, 1979:comic section), authenticating the truth of yet another apple proverb that claims that "The apple does not fall far from the tree". That is very grim humor and awakens us to the fact that often our diseases cannot be remedied by simple dietary cures. This also appears to be the message of a New Yorker cartoon from 1977 which shows a man in his bathroom standing in front of his medicine cabinet filled with apples (New Yorker, Aug. 22, 1977:70). No caption is needed, for every viewer knows immediately what proverb or idea is being illustrated. But somehow we get the feeling that all these apples will not prevent this person from eventually getting cancer or any other terminal disease that neither an apple a day nor a doctor will be able to heal. The fear of illness and perhaps the doubt in the doctor and modern medicine that cannot perform miracles are expressed in a highly pessimistic poem by Susan Fromberg Schaeffer (b. 1941), in which the mystical apple has difficulties protecting her from sickness and eventual death, symbolized by the doctor in the shape of a black crow that is ready to descend on her and declare her terminally ill (Schaeffer 1972:7-8):
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Therefore, I have hung it on strong thread In the empty space of air That waits behind the door Like a square mouth full of trees. All day now, I rock my chair And watch the doctor, A great black crow, Circling that red globe Turning one cheek, then another. O he is circling lower and lower. His wings are drooping Great black moth, he is wearing out! Warm wool, I am safe now I won't need these thick glasses again. O he is dropping Like a great piece of ash. He is kept away. I would go out now Except for the black cloud Like a shroud coming closer. It is dropping down, Already it is covering the trees In a din of cawing, Of cawing. But luckily we cope, and in many cases our folk remedies, modern medicine and the doctor can help, giving us strength and hope to live in an imperfect world. Where apples can't help, medication and advice by doctors might well heal us. This was the message on note paper distributed to doctors by the Roerig pharmaceutical company. On the top of each sheet of paper appears an advertisement for Navane medicine with a slogan including a picture of a real apple: "Navane [apple] Once a day" (c. 1975). That reminds us also of the many vitamin pills instead of apples that are being marketed to be taken "one a day" just as natural fruit products are to be consumed daily according to the proverb and nutritional rules. A humorous reaction to the fruit versus medicine conflict was well illustrated in a "B.C." cartoon stating that "An apple a day ... could turn the A.M.A. into a fruit conglomerate" (St. Louis Post Dispatch, Nov. 11, 1976:10F). Of course nobody really wants that. Folk remedies based on healthy dietary rules cannot solve serious medical problems. But it nevertheless remains a simple truth that fruit of various types is healthy for us and will help to prevent common illnesses. So let's eat our apples, as the Vermont apple growers tell us to do with a dish-towel calendar depicting apples and the proverb "An apple a day keeps the doctor away" (Oct. 1977). There is, of course, a mercantile purpose behind this advertising scheme, but an embroidery sampler from 1977 has no intentions of this type but simply delights in visualizing the valid wisdom that an apple a day will help to keep us away from the doctor a bit longer.
The four proverbs discussed in some detail in these pages represent the most popular medical wisdom expressed in folk proverbs. They do not contain scientific information based on laboratory research, but they are rather common-sense expressions based on generations of observation and experience. As with anything in life, their advice should be taken with moderation or cum grano salis. Already Hippocrates (460?-377?) argued that "Everything in excess is opposed to nature" (Stevenson 1948:719), and that is certainly true also for preventive medicine, sleeping patterns, taking care of colds and fevers, and eating apples. The fact that these proverbs give only general medical advice for healthy living will prevent them from becoming obsolete as many folk remedies have done. Our four proverbs are general enough that they have withstood the test of time and science, and it is our prognosis that they will continue to be used by people of all walks of life for generations to come. While modern medicine advances with breath-taking speed, whose intricacies are to be understood only be the experts and appreciated by those who benefit from them, traditional medical proverbs remind us of the simple pleasures of life to be enjoyed as long as we adhere to everyday health rules. As stated at the beginning of these remarks, there are dozens of other sensible medical proverbs commenting on health and illness, and there are, of course, literally hundreds of general proverbs advising us how to live properly both medically and morally. Some of these gems of wisdom continue to have significant ethical value for people of a modern society. The platitude that "An apple a day makes 365 apples a year" (Mieder 1989:271) could therefore easily be varied to read "A proverb a day makes 365 proverbs a year", and these proverbs are certainly food for thought just as apples are food for the body to assure that we continue to enjoy healthy minds in healthy bodies.
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